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Thursday, May 29, 2014

Graduating...Ed Gonzales

I know several people who are set to graduate in about a month. I would be remiss if I did not take some time to talk about what they mean to me. I have been so impacted by these kids, and I feel that it is high time to tell them. This post is about Ed Gonzales.
Ed, you are a light. Your laugh brings so much joy to me and I enjoy making you laugh so much. I also enjoy that I enjoy it and am good at it, if that makes sense. I have always enjoyed your willingness to be and to hang out, and it would not be an incorrect description to say that you have gifted me with your presence. I do not mean to seem dramatic, but I have always felt like you have such a stabilizing presence in my life. I have been able to be present with you, and that is a gift that you have given to me. It is has been a joy to see you in bible study every week and to see your faithfulness and growth that has come from it. God is turning you into a great man, and I have seen that already from you. I encourage you to continue to press into God and let Him transform you; do not let others, but let Him. I think that you are also a really trustworthy person, Ed. People feel safe with you and I think that that will increasingly come in handy in your life. One of the coolest things this year is literally getting to see you seniors grow up and that has been so true in you as well. You have brought me so much Joy Ed, and are a no-nonsense type of friend. I think that I do not even fully value you, but I do appreciate you.
Ed, thank you for what you have done in my life. Thank you for always being available for me and pursing me in the ways that I needed it. Thank you for being faithful in bible study this year, and thankful for your faithfulness in your commitment to Christ. It will only get harder, but your reward will be great, my friend.

Thursday, May 22, 2014

Graduating...Freddy Hicks

I know several people who are set to graduate in about a month. I would be remiss if I did not take some time to talk about what they mean to me. I have been so impacted by these kids, and I feel that it is high time to tell them. I am cheating for this post because it is about a senior who is not actually graduating yet.
Freddy, you are one of the good ones. Your time in college has not been one of the easiest, and you have grown accordingly. In all honesty, I am so proud of the man that you are and are becoming. I still remember your first bible study with Hiney and me, and how hard it was to get you to commit since then. Now, you are such a skeptic in the best way, and you understand well the importance of getting time with Jesus first and making sure to let Him sanctify you. You want to do right by God first and I appreciate that. I am proud of your persistence that, despite not being handed things right off, you have had to work to see things accomplished. That work has produced a mighty character within you. One of the ways that you have blessed me the most is that you have pursued me this year. It has been a year and you have frequently texted me just saying that you want to hang out and people do not really do that much with me. You have always been available and this year most notably you have been intentional. God has grown our hearts together and I am thankful that He has and that there are parts of me I see in you that I am really thankful about. You are a man of integrity and a man who seeks to bring others together and helps people feel like they are accepted and loved. Freddy, you are someone that I can trust others with and I would not hesitate to have you lead any number of things. I encourage you to continue despite things often getting difficult, because your reward is unseen.
I love you, Freddy.

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Graduating...Paul Miyake

I know several people who are set to graduate in about a month. I would be remiss if I did not take some time to talk about what they mean to me. I have been so impacted by these kids, and I feel that it is high time to tell them. This post is a man that I have become close with this year-Paul Miyake.
Paul, your growth throughout college has been stark and the only explanation is that there is a true, real God who loves you and is sanctifying you towards righteousness. I remember on a walk last year that you made a comment about how it was difficult for you to open up to people, and I could have attested to that. However, this year you have grown to the point that you are very transparent with others and it has increased your ability to lead others 100-fold. You have been such a leader to so many people this year, and not just younger people, but your peers and even to me as well. I cannot tell you how much you have grown, but it is so much. I have leaned on you more than you know this year and I appreciate your willingness to oblige me and even stick with me and allow me to be open with you about my weaknesses without fear. You have encouraged me so much without words in being in my bible study just in the way I have seen that lightbulb go off in your head as the evidence of you pondering things for the first time is displayed on your face. Additionally, I have been so thankful for the number of times that we have broken bread together over the last couple of years, and this year especially, you have taken time out of your schedule to sit with me and listen to me, and that has had such a profound impact on me this year at times when I have needed it most. You have given me a much-needed outlet for thinking through the good stimuli in my life. It is not just about in-taking good stimuli for me, but also having someone there to think through that with me, and you have obliged me in that. I have readily said that this year, though my heart has not always been in a good place, if someone needed someone to pour into them, you were someone that I would quickly point them to. I say that because I have seen Christ in you this year, in the way that you have poured into relationships, in the way that God has broken your heart for parts of the world that do not have as much access to him, the way that you have become more passionate about the Kingdom of God. I am upfront about my oft-apathetic heart, but your friendship has diminished that apathy in the slightest and I am thankful for that.
Paul, when I think of you, I think of the word Rock. You have become a consistent Rock, one of the most fundamental people around. People will for the rest of your life come to with struggles, weaknesses, because they need an ear, and just because you are available, and I am sure that it is a compliment of the highest order when I tell you that I think that that is an evidence of Jesus within you. Continue to pursue Him, my friend, because your doing so has kept me afloat this year. I love you, Paul.

Graduating...David Haynes

I know several people who are set to graduate in about a month. I would be remiss if I did not take some time to talk about what they mean to me. I have been so impacted by these kids, and I feel that it is high time to tell them. This post is about a man who is so much more than a voice-David Haynes.
David, you have been a constant source of joy to me over the past few years. You have such a diligence about you that I actually wish I had more of. Just seeing you, getting to spend time with and disciple you in how to draw closer to Christ, all the while getting to hang out with you has all contributed to a relationship that I am so thankful for. I have not been a perfect friend or discipler to you and I appreciate the grace that you have shown me in forgiving me of that and forging on. I love your laugh and your diligence in coming to both bible study and being patient in finding a time for discipleship over the past two years. I have seen the growth in you first hand, especially this year and it is so cool to see how vehemently you have pursued relationships this year. You are a man who walks lines so well-the line between Christian community and spending time with non-christians, the line between leader and humble servant, the line between friend and student. You have meant so much to people this year and I have seen you persevere through difficult times, even learning that you will be back here for summer after your fourth year. You are sassy when it is called for, but always loving and you have been a man who owns his weaknesses. You are bashful and I do believe that that is just an extension of your humility. Pride is not a word that I associate with you. Granted, it is a sin that we all struggle with, I see in you a commitment to selflessness and humility that I do not see in many others. It has been amazing as more people have complimented you and told you of the things which I now tell you to see you remain humble. I have completely loved all of the times we have just sat down to a meal together or gone and gotten boba during deltopia. You are also a great listener and I see that in your eyes as well as your reaction.
David, you have been an enormous blessing to me over the past few years, even as those around you have dropped out or burnt out on account of difficulty or increased 'business'. I encourage you to continue to remain humble, even as you pursue righteousness and sanctification. Life will only ever get more difficult and I am excited to see how God grows you to account for the challenge and I know that you are not a man who is going to shy away or back down, and I also encourage you to continue to take joy in the little things that you do. I love you, David.

Friday, May 9, 2014

Graduating...Trevor Crown

I know several people who are set to graduate in about a month. I would be remiss if I did not take some time to talk about what they mean to me. I have been so impacted by these kids, and I feel that it is high time to tell them. This post is about a future Gator and current friend, Trevor Crown.
Trevor,I have had the blessing of being friends with you since your freshman year. Since basically the first time that we spent time together we just got along and there has always been such an eclectic mix to our conversations. I have always been glad that I was a guiding force throughout your years at UCSB. You are going to go on to such great and wonderful things and I know that you left your imprint upon me. You once cried while talking about the impact that I had on your life, but truth be told you so deeply impacted me with your humor, your voice, your ability to include me and just what our friendship looked like. It was so nice to have someone that I could be deep or shallow with. It will sure be hard to be here without you next year, my boy. I still remember when you asked me to disciple you and I knew that we would only grow together after that. You have such a good spirit about you, and I encourage you to continue to admit your weaknesses and inadequacies as you have become much better at. I also remember vague answer Trevor and how I had to wear you down and encourage you to answer me directly and truthfully. But most of all I will remember the things that really make you Trevor-the spiritual network, the silly faces you would make toward me in bible study, the subtle ways that you love and care for the people around you, your crazy schedule, the way that you are good at keeping in contact with a large number of people. You are a friendship that I do not intend to lose, and I desire that you continue to change me and give me cause to think about the world differently. You are going to be successful but because of hard work and not because of natural ability, which you have in abundance. I could go on forever, really because the more I write the more beautiful I realize that our relationship actually is. I love you, Trev.

Thursday, May 8, 2014

Graduating...Jeff Felker

I know several people who are set to graduate in about a month. I would be remiss if I did not take some time to talk about what they mean to me. I have been so impacted by these kids, and I feel that it is high time to tell them. Starting with the Captain, The Burger Master, Jeff Felker.
Jeff, when I first met you is was at the starbucks' social your freshmen year and you were this young engineer. Since then I have seen you grow so much. You have struggled at times and at times been joyful, but God has steadily grown you. You are a man who has personally blessed me in more ways than I can count and I just want to take some time to thank you, Jeff. You have been a special type of friend to me for a long time, and it is amazing to me how easily people feel accepted and loved by you and the way that you go out of your way to love people is noticeable and worthy of emulation in my view. Your understanding of the gospel and the Kingdom of God has grown so much and you are more and more becoming a man who is unwilling to water down the gospel for anything or anyone and that very much excites me. I think that you will continue to do great even beyond college wherever you end up simply because I saw you rise to every occasion in college. Yes, there were times when you struggled and cried and we simply just had to watch the office because we were both sad, but you have used that and you know that you have used that. In addition to all of this, Jeff, you have always listened to me and been open with me, ever since I have known you. You have not only listened to the advice that I have given you, but just listened when I spoke as well.
Ultimately, I cannot thank you enough, Jeff for the man that you are and I want to tell you that I look up to you so much more than you know and consider you as better than me in so many areas. You are a great man who is great because God has made you great. Continue to pursue Christ even though it is so hard to do, and He will give you the desires of your heart and make those desires for Him. Continue to practice generosity , hospitality, and most importantly Love. I love you, Jeff.

Friday, May 2, 2014

23

I turn 23 today. I remind of this not to be celebrated, but to increase the ethos of the post that I am about to write and to give myself reason to pause and consider what I have learned over the past 12 months. I have made so many mistakes in that time-too many to count or name, really. But, I am so thankful that I have a King, a Father, who uses my mistakes, though they be many, to make me into that which He has already declared me to be (righteous). So, over the past 12 months, I have learned much, struggled, laughed-hard, thought thoughts that led to more thoughts to the point that I lost track of myself, cooked great food, started two jobs and quit one, and hopefully most of all, loved. So, please allow me take a moment to share what I have learned throughout the past year.
-I understand women less now than ever before. Understand what I mean by that: I mean that I can predict their actions, but only by predicting the most illogical course of undertaking, and to me, that makes no sense.
-God uses all of my mistakes. It is only I who makes them, but God uses each and every one of them, as said above. I reiterate this because if it were not true, I would have wasted so much of my past year.
-I am and will only be in more increasing measure as my life goes on, entirely frustrated with life's trivialities. Small talk, petty disagreements, bad food, complaints, poor stimuli-all of it is very frustrating to me and something that I merely tolerate, or at times outright disregard.
-I live like royalty, especially from the perspective of anyone born before 1950, outside of America. I have access to so much, and from those whom have been given much, much will be expected.
-Living like Jesus is hard, and it requires a lifetime to understand really what that means. It is complicated, yet simple, hard, yet easy, uncomfortable, yet enjoyable, restricting, yet freeing. It is something that requires action, choice, belief, and faith all in one. I have a responsibility to those who are the least.
-I live in a culture that is poisonous because it streams sex and violence to us in large quantities constantly. I and my fellow Americans, especially Californians, are given sex and violence so much that we have become desensitized to the perversion of it all. It is difficult and I desire that God purge me of the evil that media and culture have done to me.
-I think (most) people in general do not value each other really. They take relationships for granted, and I have come to notice even as I sit and toil, trying to develop quality relationships, more often than not people are content to pursue and invest in entirely those people whom it is easiest to do so in.
-Social stigmas are one of the ugliest facets of our culture. We have come up with loaded terms which we use to utterly dehumanize and devalue people. It is quite disgusting to me.
-Money is a merely instrumental good, nothing more. It's alluring offer of security, comfort, and joy is empty and it is only a stepping stone to further develop eternal things.
-Human relationships are of vital importance, but come up short when compared to the importance of a divine romance.
-People will show you that they love you in at times very small, insignificant ways. It is worthwhile to be able to ingest these and understand the intent behind them.
-I have many quality relationships in my life.
-My oft struggle to feel emotions is going to be a much longer and more difficult struggle than I though originally.
-Not having insecurities and living life to its most honest degree will inevitably lead to hurt.
-Everything, all of my motivations, my thoughts, my actions, my words, my desires, my values, if not wrapped up in Jesus, are not worth it. He must guide my thoughts for all good in me comes from Him and all evil within me comes from myself.
And finally,
-I am an extremely broken, imperfect person. I am so far from perfection and I am not the Loving, humble, gentle, passionate, intense, honest, pure, caring, kind, servant that I wish that I was and that I pray that I become. I at times neglect responsibilities or view them ambivalently and I am very aware of my own selfishness and how deep it is. I am so thankful that I have a Father who works these things out of me and forgives me in my weakness. "Lord Jesus, son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner."
So, that about sums up the lessons I have taken away from the past 12 months. Do not get me wrong, there are many more, but these will suffice for now. I hope that there is something that sparks your interest here or at least gets you thinking.
~Good Luck and Good Eats